Phone Tree
by LuffyKun3695
Summary: Fuuka is battling her body issues, not realizing that Yotsuba and Ena's cup-phones are still in her room. Fluff. One-Shot. Fuuka/Koiwai.


**Fuuka is battling her body issues, not realizing that Yotsuba and Ena's cup-phones are still in her room. Fluff. One-Shot. [Fuuka/Koiwai]**

**AUTHOR'S NOTES: **This is my _favorite _pairing in the Yotsubato fandom. I love both characters to death. I wrote this because my boyfriend hates cell phones. He is really not the phone-talking type and one day while reading this together he said jokingly, "I envy Koiwai, he doesn't have a cell phone. His girl can't bug him!" I grinned and said, "No, he has a CUP phone and Fuuka has a _direct_ line." Then we burst out laughing. Also, Fuuka's body issues hit close to home for me, since I have big hips and big boobs and often find myself wishing I was slimmer like many of the size two models I see on television. It's hard to be a size eight in a size zero world, even if you're not unattractive. My boyfriend constantly tells me I am gorgeous and loves my body, with every lump and bump. Thus this piece of cotton-candy fluff was born.

**DEDICATIONS: **This fanfiction is dedicated to my boyfriend, the man who hates the phone and loves me.

**WARNINGS:** There is a pretty major age difference between Fuuka and Koiwai, seeing as she is sixteen and he in his late twenties or early thirties (they haven't really specified), so if that bothers you please don't read this. I would like to remind you though, that the age of consent in Japan for sexual activity is younger than it is in America. So their relationship would most likely be legal. There is also adult language and sexual implications.

**PAIRINGS:** Fuuka/Koiwai

Yotsubato © Kiyohiko Azuma  
>Fanfiction © Courtney Dracon (LuffySP)<p>

* * *

><p>"<strong>Phone Tree"<strong>

Fuuka lay on her back in her room. She clenched her stomach as tight as she could and pressed her legs together, lifting them five inches off the ground. She pointed her toes and began counting to fifteen, attempting to hold the position. _I can lose weight!_ She mentally reassured herself, as she began the tedious countdown. Suddenly, fifteen seconds became fifteen years. Her thighs burned with the effort and she slammed them back into her bedroom carpet. _Only three seconds, dammit!_

She sighed, throwing an arm over her eyes, Fuuka tried not to cry. She felt utterly useless. She was always going to be fatter than her sister. She had these super fat legs while Asagi effortlessly slipped into the smallest and most fashionable clothing. Hell, she couldn't even wear her hand-me-downs. Fuuka had attempted to borrow a pair of her jeans before, only to have the seams split when she tried to pull them up her legs!

Fuuka lamented her situation. She would always be the "middle one" of the three. Since Asagi was the pretty one and Ena the smart one. She was the one doomed with the short, unruly birch hair and thick eyebrows, while both her sisters had shiny, silky manes with perfect complexions. They also dressed better than she did. Sure, she made a joke of it, wearing funky and weird tee shirts around the house to hide her shameful body, but how she longed to wear those girly maxi-skirts and blouses like Asagi or even the cute little rompers that Ena was always sporting.

She wanted to scream.

"God I am SO ugly!" Fuuka barked the words to an empty room. She wasn't sure who she was yelling at, but the yelling felt good. She screamed some more. Soon, words escaped her and it was simply noises, angry expulsions of her frustration and helplessness personified in noise. She stamped her feet and pounded her fists. Rolling back and forth across the carpet, Fuuka screamed and screamed. As loud as she could without disturbing anyone downstairs…

"I don't think so."

She nearly jumped out of her skin when a man's voice interrupted her. She frantically looked around the room, attempting to locate the source of the noise, finding that she was indeed, still alone in her room. "W—who is there?" Fuuka stuttered, unable to keep the fear welling up inside her from her voice. She could feel tears appearing in the corners of her big, brown eyes as her heart beat rapidly sped up. _Dear God, I am going to be slaughtered. There is a murderer in my room and I am going to die. With fat legs! How will they fit me in the crematorium?_

"I am GOD." The voice replied, deep and booming. She blinked. _What? _Suddenly, the room filled with laughter, "No, it's Koiwai. From next door? It seems that Yotsuba must have left this cup phone here by my desk. I have concluded that the other half is in your room, since it is your voice I have been hearing screaming like a banshee." He explained.

Fuuka blushed a deep crimson, her momentary rants from only a moment ago filling her head. _Had Koiwai-San really heard all of that?_ How embarrassing. She twiddled her thumbs and walked over to her window, picking up the tiny paper cup with the drawing of an animal face on it, she held it to her mouth, "Sorry," she whispered into the mouth of it. Tentatively, she raised her gaze to find herself staring into the eyes of her neighbor. He was dressed in his usual uniform of a white undershirt and brightly colored boxers. Today, his underwear was cyan and red, covered in a huge fish pattern. She tried not to laugh.

"Where is Yotsuba-Chan?" she asked him, awkwardly. She hoped that the little girl had not heard her self-deprecating tantrum as well. The last thing she needed was Yotsuba repeating any of what she had said to Asagi. She just knew that her maniacal evil genius, blonde sister would lord it over her for the rest of her life. The only thing that kept Fuuka going sometimes was the fact that her older sister thought she was much more confident about herself than she really was.

"She delivered me some pictures that Asagi's friend took of her, then she rushed back over your house to mooch food." He said matter-of-factly, shaking his head. He ran his fingers through his hair and sighed, "I apologize for that, by the way. I _do _feed her." Koiwai smiled, his dark eyes shining. Fuuka smiled back.

"It's fine." She reassured him. They watched each other for a few seconds in silence.

Koiwai really wasn't all that bad looking. He was of an average build, with an attractive face and nice hair. She liked how he always seemed to have a perpetual five o' clock shadow from working as much as he did. Sure, he was eccentric, but he was in fact, the father of the boisterous green-haired girl she had come to love over these past few months. Yet somehow, to her his face seemed forever serene, his eyes pools of calming obsidian. She admired his nonchalance as something she could never obtain. Fuuka had never been the type to "go with the flow" and be comfortable with herself the way he was. She didn't know when it had happened, but somewhere along the way she had fallen in love with her neighbor.

"You shouldn't say that, you know." Koiwai's voice broke her from her reverie. Fuuka gave him a confused look and he smiled at her behind his crumpled cup phone. His dark eyes danced with words she could not translate.

"Say what?" she asked.

"That you are ugly." He told her, "You're not ugly. Girls your age shouldn't say such nasty things about themselves." Koiwai frowned at her. His expression bordered on serious, if only momentarily and Fuuka felt like he was staring into her soul. She shook off the feeling. This man did not know the meaning of the word serious; he wore boxers on his head for god sakes.

"Oh come on!" Fuuka pouted, "Aren't_ you_ the one who said that I can't swim because heavy things sink in the water?" she spat, reminding him of their day at the pool. _God, was she embarrassed that day!_ She hadn't really meant to flirt with Koiwai at the pool, but the way he had stared made her slightly hopeful. However, when he and Jumbo shut her down, dismissing her body (and bikini) like she was a child, her already fragile ego took a hard blow. Fuuka harrumphed and placed an impertinent hand on her left hip.

Koiwai grinned at her, his expression clear even from a distance, "Fuuka-Chan!" he said in a sing-song manner, caressing the cup phone with his voice, "Wasn't it also Jumbo who said that men like women with a little _meat on their bones_? Who is to say I am not one of those men?" his tone was lascivious to say the least.

Fuuka nearly dropped her cup as a shiver ran down her spine. A blush redder than the fires of hell made its way across her pale features and she tried not to meet his eyes. This was all really a dream, right? Some sort of weird fever dream that one got from eating too many snacks and exercising too close together. She was insane, right? "L—liar." She whispered, any previous confidence she had been feigning long gone.

"Have you ever known me to lie?" Koiwai asked her, his voice reassuring. "I think you have a beautiful body. In fact, I have loved your body ever since you got that adorable ass of yours stuck in my bathroom window." Fuuka stared at him. The naughty grin he was wearing never left his face. He must be playing her. No man would find a big ass attractive. That was impossible.

"A—asshole…" She managed.

"Gorgeous." He replied.

Fuuka stamped her foot, "Koiwai-San, don't play with me. It isn't fair." She was starting to cry now. It was one thing to find out some classmate you were crushing on was dating someone else. It was another thing entirely to have the guy you were in love with play with your heartstrings directly for his own entertainment. She may not have had much confidence, but she was better than that. She deserved more!

Koiwai looked hurt. He frowned at her and spoke carefully, emphasizing each word, "I am not playing with you, Fuuka-Chan." He was beginning to get angry now, his voice rising slightly in pitch. "Let me prove it. Come over here right now and I will." Koiwai crushed the cup phone in his hand and walked away from the window. Conversation over. Challenge initiated. Fuuka stood in her room in silence.

It was only a split-second before she tore from her room and was running down the stairs.

His door opened before she even got a chance to knock and she was staring up at him. They locked eyes and proceeded to glare venomously at one another. Staring at each other in silence, waiting to see who would be the first to break their momentary stalemate. Fuuka raised an eyebrow at him and pushed out her lower lip in defiance. Her eyes were still sparkling with fresh tears. She crossed her arms over her dorky _86 K-Cal_ tee shirt and demanded, "Well?"

Koiwai couldn't help but smile at her. His momentary anger dissipated as quickly as it had come. He adored everything about her, from her would-be tough girl attitude to her stupid tee shirts. He leaned down and kissed her. Her eyelashes fluttered downward and whatever animosity or doubt she had been feeling quickly began to disappear. The older man quickly pulled her into the house, kicking the door shut behind them with his bare foot.

In the tiny entrance hall, he pushed her back against the wall and kissed her deeper. He pressed his tongue against her lips until she permitted him entrance. She sighed as he danced his tongue across hers. Fuuka worked to match his movements and despite her inexperience, she managed well. He ran his fingers through her hair, and cupped her face in his hands, angling her chin upward so that he had better access to her plump little lips.

Fuuka did not do much exploring of her own. She had plenty of time for that in the future. For now, she wrapped her arms around his neck and held tightly, if simply only to reassure herself, that he was indeed very, very real and very much hers. Falling in love with Koiwai was not really on her list of things she planned to do this summer, but she was delighted it had happened. Never had she felt so beautiful as she did in the eyes of this man. That in itself, was a blessing all its own.

Koiwai smiled into their kisses. He hadn't really been looking for anyone. He hadn't expected to fall in love, least of all with his young neighbor. He took fine care of Yotsuba by himself. He didn't need a wife. But Fuuka walked into his life on moving day and told him about the city trash schedule and something clicked. Maybe he just needed someone on his wavelength. Just so she knew he was really serious, he slid his hands down her back and gave her butt a loving, possessive squeeze.

"Asshole" she whispered.

"Gorgeous" he replied.

Fuuka shook her head. She couldn't help but smile when he spoke to her. Especially now that she knew he was sincere. She looked up at him through her shaggy bangs, "I think we should get cell phones. Cup phones are _so _five minutes ago." She grinned up at him. Koiwai tapped his chin in pretend contemplation, and smiled at her. Gently, he brushed her hair from her face and tucked it behind her ear affectionately.

"I was thinking about that." Koiwai replied, grinning. "What model do you like?" he asked her, playfully. Fuuka feigned her own thought process, tapping her lips and looking around the room with exaggerated movements. She expelled low _hmmmms _and _mmmns_, embellishing her faux consideration with gusto. Koiwai laughed at her.

"I hear the AU _A999ZX _is a good model." She laughed to herself as she recalled Miura's cup-phone model. Suddenly, there was a click and a snap as Koiwai's window flew open. They both looked in the direction of the window in time to see the cup phone disappear in a flash as it was forcibly pulled from the other end into Fuuka's room across the tiny alley. They sat in silence for a moment, waiting to hear the reply. They had forgotten that during their conversation Koiwai had crushed his daughter's cup phone in his anger.

"WHAT HAPPENED TO MY PHONE?" Yostuba's voice came shrieking from the Ayase household. Fuuka and Koiwai looked at each other and burst out laughing, sliding to the floor holding hands.

"Asshole." Fuuka giggled.

"I'll get her a new one, gorgeous." He snickered.

**END**


End file.
